When we got home I started asking her what the matter was and she of course said “nothing.” I kept after her and she finally broke down and cried,...saying she was ugly, she had braces on her teeth, none of the boys in school liked her, etc. I tried to console her, saying she wasn’t ugly, and it wasn’t her fault that the guys in school hadn’t figured out that she was nice looking and just slow to develop. I pointed out that not every girl in our school had big boobs, or was gorgeous. I pointed. The lights began to look spread out like water on a windshield. And still we were snakes. Bumping into each other and pulling apart like smoke. I had claws and you had claws. We were snatching at each other. Harder and harder now. I could almost feel these imaginary things on my body. This smoke, these scales, those nails. And I’m hinting about bed rooms and blankets. Complaining of the cold just so you can warm me. Touch me, taste me, feel me, desire me, want me, so much that we burn with. The sound of water rushing under me was masking the other night sounds. It was unlikely that I would hear anything unless it was nearby. I had to rely on the night vision of the predator I had become.There had been no indication from my inspection of the first bridge that my target was nearby. It was when I approached the second that I caught the scent of smoke. It was reefer. The sentry was there and had been smoking a joint when we arrived. The odor was faint but my heightened senses led me. Is that really the way he thought of me? Was he seeing me as the ‘cum slut’ he’d call me? My thinking became more neurotic and i needed reassurance that things were still cool between us. i decided i had to talk to him about what i was feeling. i had to know.When i brought it up to him, he said i shouldn’t think like that about it; that it was just sex talk. He said “I didn’t realize these things were bothering you. I thought it turned you on. If you want to stop, we can. Do you to stop Terry?”.
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